Other options
If you absolutely can't bring yourself to sip even the best martini, there are still options open. Is it the olive that offends? Try the lemon twist. Or try the martini's rarefied cousin, the Gibson. Beware, this simple variation stumps many modern "bartenders".
If all else fails: The Gimlet. Still straight up, still vodka or gin. Still elegant. Still brings a smile to the face of the knowing bartender.
Practice makes perfect
If you find yourself in a restaurant, and the waiter asks you if you'd like to start with a cocktail,
have a martini, straight up, and see how worlds of forgotten possibilities suddenly open up to you.
Try these:
The Dry Martini.
Same as above, except hold the stem of the glass tightly and shake out the excess vermouth with more vigor.
The Very Dry Martini.
Hold the glass near your lips and whisper softly, "Vermouth."
The Dirty Martini.
Stir in a little olive juice straight from the jar. Make it as dirty as you wish.
The Twist.
If you wish to garnish with a lemon twist instead, twist the lemon strip over the drink to release the oil in the peel. Rub the twist peel side down along the rim of the glass and drop it in.
The Gibson.
Take out the olive garnish and drop in a skewered cocktail onion and you have a whole new drink!
The Gimlet.
Follow the martini recipe, but substitute Rose's Lime for the dry vermouth. Beware when ordering in a bar, as bartenders frequently use too much Rose's. It shouldn't be syrupy. Ugh.
May I suggest?
Vodka:
Belvedere, Grey Goose, Ketel One, Wyborowa, Tanqueray Sterling, oh, and by the way, it's pronounced
Stol-eech-nye-ya, with the accent on the SECOND syllable.
Gin:
Bombay Sapphire is the best. Boodles, Bombay, and Tanqueray are all respectable.
Remember...
A martini is an event. It isn't just another beer, or a Diet Coke, or some God-awful restaurant iced tea. A martini lives in the moment, with you.
