The Talk
Herpes, Genital Warts, Gonorrhea, Syphilis, Aids. Not the most fun topics to discuss at any time, let alone with someone you find drop dead sexy. For many, if not most of us, there is nothing so difficult as talking about sex with the one you love, or the one for whom you lust. People married for decades often find it impossible to mention sex and yet, you must discuss it with someone you've known a relatively short period of time. Whether it comes on the first date or well into a long-term dating relationship, it is a moment so frightening and so uncomfortable that often times, it is simply ignored. But, it is exceedingly important, a moment of truth that can have enormous impact on your life.
Get Over It
Trepidation, fear, uneasiness, panic. Whatever you call it, this is the time to overcome it. This isn't a time to be polite, or demure. Your best choice is to be straightforward. Don't wait to bring up the subject until the moment of truth. And if you do, don't be ambiguous with questions like, "is it alright?" or "do I have anything to worry about?" Initiate the talk ahead of time. Find a quiet place where you won't be interrupted and just dive in. Say:
We need to talk about sex and STD's.
I want to talk to you about sex.
I've been thinking about our making love, but first we need to talk.
You're incredibly attractive and I can't stop thinking about our getting closer. Let's talk about where we're going.
It's difficult, I know, but what you are really saying is, "I want to talk to you about life...ours."
I Just Can't Do It
If you just can't bring yourself to initiating the subject in straightforward manner consider:
Sending a card or e-mail expressing your readiness to talk about "more serious issues."
Renting a movie that just happens to deal with AIDS or STD's and then talk about it.
Mentioning some recent related event and then segue into its meaning for the two of you.
