Used to be, a gal had to chase a man down in the streets, bop ‘em on the head with a fryin’ pan and drag his carcass home for some real good luvin’.

Nowadays, a lady kin just write herself a little story about how purty she is and what a good wife she’d be, post it on the Internet and wait for all the good-lookin’ menfolk to come traipsing up to her door. Yup, ya heard right. You kin do it on the Internet.

A course, lotsa other wimmin know about this trick, too, which is why you gotta be real special fur a fella ta give you some notice. What you gotta do is make yerself a real good Internet profile, sumthin’ that helps you stand out from all those other wimminfolk lookin’ fer men.

Y’all gather ‘round now, y’hear? Listen up as this here Sadie Hawkins gal gives y’all the very best dirt on how to land yerself a real, live ‘lectronic man. A course, you menfolk can read up, too. Maybe yer lookin’ fer yer very own lady love?